Can I Change My Child's Surname Without the Father’s Consent?

Can I Change My Child's Surname Without the Father’s Consent?

This is one of the most common—and stressful—questions we get asked at UK Name Change.

Perhaps the father is absent, or perhaps you just want your child to share your name to feel like a proper family unit. Whatever the reason, you need to know where you stand legally before you spend money on a Deed Poll.

The short answer is: It depends entirely on whether the father has "Parental Responsibility".

Here is the simple legal checklist to find out if you need his permission or if you can go it alone.

Step 1: Does He Have "Parental Responsibility"?

Parental Responsibility (PR) is the legal power to make decisions about a child's life. If a father has PR, you cannot legally change the child's name without his written consent (or a court order).

The PR Checklist

A father automatically has Parental Responsibility if:

• He was married to you when the child was born (or married you afterwards).
• His name is listed on the Birth Certificate (and the child was born after 1st December 2003).
• He has a formal Parental Responsibility Agreement with you.
• He has a Court Order (like a Child Arrangements Order) that grants him PR.

If any of these apply, you MUST have his consent.
If you try to change the name behind his back, he can take you to court, and a judge will almost certainly reverse the name change.

Scenario A: He Has PR, But Refuses to Sign

If he has Parental Responsibility but refuses to agree to the name change, you are in a difficult spot. You cannot use a standard Deed Poll yet.

Your Options:

• Mediation: Often, a father refuses because he feels he is being "erased" from the child's life. A mediator can help you negotiate.
• Double-Barrelling: This is the most successful compromise. Fathers are often happy to add your name (e.g., Smith-Jones) even if they refuse to remove their own.
• Court Order (Specific Issue Order): If he still says no, you can apply to the Family Court for permission.

Will the Court Agree?

Be warned: UK Courts view a surname as a vital link to a child’s biological identity. They rarely grant orders to remove a father's name purely because you "don't like him" or he pays no maintenance. You generally need to prove that keeping the name is harmful to the child (e.g., in cases of abuse or severe abandonment).

Scenario B: He Does NOT Have Parental Responsibility

If he was never married to you AND is not on the birth certificate, he likely does not have Parental Responsibility.

In this specific case, you do not strictly need his permission. As the mother and sole holder of Parental Responsibility, you have the legal right to change your child’s name via Deed Poll.

(Note: It is still considered "best practice" to notify him if he is in contact with the child, as he could apply for PR later and challenge it. But legally, you are in the driving seat).

What About Absent Fathers?

If the father has PR but has disappeared completely (no contact, no address, no maintenance) for a significant period, you can't get his signature.

In this case, you still technically need a Court Order to dispense with his consent. However, if you can prove to the court that you have made every reasonable effort to find him and he cannot be traced, the court will usually grant you permission.

Summary: Can You Buy a Child Deed Poll?

Ready to Proceed?

If you have the father's consent (or if you are the sole legal guardian), changing your child's name is simple.

For £19.49, we provide the Child Deed Poll and the official Letter of Consent templates you need to show schools, doctors, and the Passport Office.